Top Ten Things Pissing South Carolinians Off about America

Most of you must have heard that Rep. Joe Wilson of South Carolina heckled President Obama while he was giving a speech to the joint session of Congress. What many of you probably did not know is that the congressman did not just let his emotion take control of him. People of South Carolina have always had reason to be pissed off with America.

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Here are the top ten reasons why South Carolinians are pissed off:

1.) That despite being one of the original 13 colonies, South Carolina has not produced a president since Andrew Johnson in 1829.

2.) The first slave insurrection took place in Stono area near Charleston in 1739. So South Carolinians can easily identify a radical black Muslim cum socialist born in Kenya but claims to be an American.

3.) That even though their native son, Joe Frazier, defeated Muhammad Ali at the Madison Square Garden heavyweight boxing fight of 1971, it is Ali that the world remembers as the greatest.

4.) That the bleeding heart liberal, Stephen Colbert, is unfortunately from South Carolina.

5.) South Carolina was the first state to secede from the Union because they want to keep their slaves. The first gun shot of the American Civil war took place at Fort Sumter in Charleston Harbor, April 12, 1861. Yet, they get no respect from the rest of the States.

6.) Nobody can explain why South Carolina has the highest rate of stroke death in America.

7.) Most South Carolinians believe that if a black man must be president, it should at least come from South Carolina. After all, they created the Red Shirts, the Redeemers and all those natives who terrorized black voters. They once presented a native son, Jesse Jackson, but America rejected him. Now America wants South Carolinians to respect Chicago’s Obama. No way.

8.) It was in 1774 that South Carolinians elected Francis Salvador to the General Assembly. He was the first Jew ever elected to public office in America. South Carolinians therefore can identify a black puppet put in office by Jews and it ticks them off.

9.) No major professional sports franchise is in South Carolina. No NFL, NHL, NBA, MLS, or MLB team is located in the state. The humiliation is too great to bear. They therefore have no other option but to show their aggression somewhere.

10.) The U.S. Air Force dropped an unarmed Nuclear Boob on their state in 1950s. Since then, they have smelt a conspiracy to wipe them out.