The art of breaking up!!

Well! Is it really an art?! Or science?! Considering the amount of what I call ‘Emotional Technicalities’ involved, makes it eligible to be the doctoral thesis material for a psychologist! I guess it is a scientific artifact! Why I’m calling it an artifact is because it is us who came up with this stupid term, or rather serious for the one who knows the inside out story or the one who is currently experiencing this entirely intangible phenomena of a BREAK UP!

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First of all, let me clarify one thing! I am not a disgusted guy, just ditched by a gal, totally heartbroken; feeling like this is the end of my life!! Or with an eternal mindset with things like “why did she?? I mean the hell?? What did I do??Am I really that bad??Or she just got bored of me?”. I have never been in a relationship at the first place! So that gives me enough freedom n scope for my own analysis and interpretations. The write up is totally based on my own assumptions or may be even presumptions.

A break up is not that one would think of often if u r in a relationship. If you are thinking of it often, it either shows your insecurity or your willingness to call it quits! A relationship starts off with a flurry of nice things! Things which you desire to be that way eternally! A relationship is all about cherishable moments! You get into a relationship on a quest for such moments. And that’s what keeps a relationship alive! You love your partner more than anything else in the world. You tend to do stuffs which your partner likes, in a way, losing the real YOU!

Am not contemplating you shouldn’t be doing it. But you shouldn’t go so far that you end up with an identity crisis! It’s totally fine to impress your partner and make him feel elated by doing things that surprise him, coming up with ideas that would flatter him, and thereby extracting pleasure out of your partner’s. But you should know that this is not the only way through which you can get pleasure and there’s a life for you, outside the sphere of your relationship.

More often than not, people get lost so much so in their relationships that they entirely are thrown off guard when they take a look at the world outside! They would have probably forgotten the way things work around in the world. And this is the reason why, getting out of the relationship or what we call a BREAK UP always leave the partners in a state of emotional trauma. In a state where they feel that there’s nothing worse in the world that could have happened to them!

To all such people who think in those terms, I just want to say one thing! CUT THE CRAP! Seriously…people may say that am being a bit harsh, or may be right royally harsh. But I don’t think so. I do understand that it’s not easy to deal with it. Especially when the break up is pretty fresh! I certainly respect such emotions. I do! Believe me! But it’s not as large or as hard as u make it up to be. It’s just a way of life now! We are humans and it’s in our DNA to search and get probably the best. Whatever you have may have a better counterpart!! That’s what human nature is all about and that is how a human mind (and probably even heart) works!

If you are one of them, you should realize that things cannot be changed right now and the only way out of it is to get over with it, once and for all. Do not give any room whatsoever for hope. A mirror once broken can’t be fixed. Don’t even try to reconcile because that magic won’t be there even if you do get back together. Even though it’s way too tough to put it into practice, you should gather all your guts to make sure it happens. Or else, you will be on a path of self destruction.

There will always be some people who care for your happiness. Reach out to them. Am sure they’ll help you out. And for god’s sake, don’t ever beg your partner to get back with you. Don’t be a sycophant. On the contrary, show the other person that you’ve moved on. Get rid of things that remind you of your partner. Do not give him an impression that you don’t have a life without him. Let the other one know that you are just doing fine. Learn to be selfish! Think of yourself! Put your life ahead of his. Reduce or even its better to stop being in touch in few cases. Again, it’s my opinion.

Do interact more with your friends and share with them what you are going through. Friends are the best doctors you can get. They can fix almost anything on earth that has a problem. After all, life’s a lesson and this was a part of it…whether you like it or not is not in the frame.

Do realize that life’s got so many things to offer. Some turn good n some go bad. All you can do is to try and deal with it without losing yourself. Everything has a solution and so does a break up!! To deal with it is an art! And you gain it only through experience!! The more relationships you break out of, the more easily you’ll be able to let go!! This is my theory! I don’t care whether it works or not!! Not even a bit!!

HAPPY BREAKUP!!