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Katherine walked into the kitchen last summer and told her parents to stop what they were doing because she had something important to tell them. Gov. Deval Patrick of Massachusetts and his wife, Diane, halted everything, tense and troubled. Then the 17 year old teen asked her aunt in the kitchen to leave.
Katherine’s mother, like any other parent expected a terrible news. Could it be a grave sickness? Could it be unexpected pregnancy? Could it be crime committed? What could be wrong? Where did we go wrong?
“I’m a lesbian,” Katherine said.
Her mother fought a desire to burst out laughing. She was relieved. “Well, we love you no matter what?,” said her father, wrapping her in a hug.
The story of Katherine Patrick and her family as published in the gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender newspaper called Bay Windows was welcomed as a model for parents to adopt in such coming-out-situation.
“This is a very powerful statement and image for the rest of the country to see a very public father embracing his openly lesbian daughter,” said Steve Ralls of Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays to the Boston Globe.
“I am so proud of Governor Deval Patrick,” said Marc Solomon of MassEquality to Boston Globe, “he fought his hardest for our community before he knew his daughter was a part of it. He and Diane are the parents that every gay kid dreams of having.”
Public figures like Vice President, Dick Cheney, former US representative, Dick Gephardt have had their daughters come out as gays. Dick Cheney’s daughter had a baby last year with her partner.
The same could not be said of the daughter of one time Republican presidential candidate, Alan Keyes. When his daughter announced that she was a lesbian, he threw her out of the house and halted all financial supports for her. Mayor Jerry Sanders of San Diego reversed his opposition to same-sex marriage upon discovering that his daughter is gay.
With gay marriages taking place in Los Angeles and Massachusetts, the Patricks, the Gephardts and the Cheneys can look forward to weddings. And like the Cheneys, they can look forward to grandchildren.
But for gay men, how do they approach their parents to announce that they are gay? What will their parents think of first? Will the parents think about wedding? Will they think about grandchildren? Will the reaction of parents change with a change in the tool as well as a change in the hole? Is that the reason why there are not many celebrated coming out stories involving gay men? Does the world see Lesbians as girls playing around while gay men have something else going on? Is the world more tolerant of lesbians than gay men?
