Egyptian Cleric Says Allah "Honors" Wives With Beatings For Refusing Sex With Husbands

According to Egyptian cleric Sa'd Arafat, a man has every right to beat his wife, that is, with certain qualifications. He can't pummel her in the face and make her ugly, and it can only be if she refuses to have sex with him. I suppose that's because he might regret making her unappealing for the next time he wants to bed her down, so anywhere else on her body is fair game, since he wouldn't have to see the bruises on her face while he rapes her. There are other stipulations that he mentioned in an interview on Al-Nas TV back in February, 2010, snippets of which can be seen on video here; but everything he says is a testament to how many men view women in that culture: as a piece of property to be used at will, and no better than an animal. In the West it's called spousal abuse. In Islam it's called a man's religious prerogative. After all, Mohammad said it was cool.

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The interviewer starts off with a statement claiming that European women want a guardian as a mate, and that ninety percent of British women want a "manly man", someone who is strong not weak. There is a difference between a strong man and a wife-beater, but I suppose that's not something either the interviewer or the cleric would understand, and I'm not sure where he got that information, but Western women love freedom too much to want a man that will force them under a burqa, and to stay at home.

He then brings up the issue of wife-beating in Islam:

Wife beating is a serious accusation [leveled against Islam]. Let us examine this matter bit by bit.

Sa'd Arafat: Allah honored wives by instating the punishment of beatings.

Interviewer: Honored them with beatings? How is this possible?!

My question exactly: honor? What honor is there in beating up a woman? None whatsoever, but Arafat says:

Sa'd Arafat: The prophet Muhammad said: "Don't beat her in the face, and do not make her ugly." See how she is honored. If the husband beats his wife, he must not beat her in the face. Even when he beats her, he must not curse her. This is incredible! He beats her in order to discipline her.

Discipline? Like a child or an animal? How enlightened is that? And I guess he should beat her while laughing. Nice. Then Arafat goes on to say:

In addition, there must not be more than ten beatings, and he must not break her bones, injure her, break her teeth, or poke her in the eye. There is a beating etiquette. If he beats to discipline her, he must not raise his hand high. He must beat her from chest level. All these things honor the woman.

She is in need of discipline. How should the husband discipline her? Through admonishment. If she is not deterred, he should refuse to share the bed with her. If she is not repentant, he should beat her, but there are rules to the beating. It is forbidden to beat her in the face or make her ugly. When you beat her, you must not curse her. Islam forbids this.

That's some pretty twisted honoring. And cursing is forbidden but beating is not? What's with that? Then comes the question about how the man should beat her.

Interviewer: With what should be beat her? With his bare hand? With a rod?

Sa'd Arafat: If he beats her, the beatings should not be hard, so that they do not leave a mark. He can beat her with a short rod. He must avoid beating her in the face or in places in the head where it hurts. The beatings should be on the body and should not come one right after the other. These are all choices made during the process, but beatings are allowed only as a last resort.

I thought the Qu'ran said a toothbrush. Where did the rod come from?

Then comes the clincher. The man can only beat her for not having sex with him.

The honoring of the wife in Islam is also evident in the fact that the punishment of beating is permissible in one case only: when she refuses to sleep with him.

Interviewer: When she refuses to sleep with him?

Sa'd Arafat: Yes, because where else could the husband go? He wants her, but she refuses. He should begin with admonishment and threats...

Interviewer: Allow me to repeat this. A man cannot beat his wife...

Interviewer: ...over food or drink. Beatings are permitted only in this case, which the husband cannot do without.

How offensive to condone beating a wife because she doesn't want to, or isn't feeling up to having sex with her husband. Can the wife do the same thing to the man, if he refuses?

There is NOTHING honorable in beating your spouse for any reason! Male or female. It's religiously justified domestic abuse and nothing more. A couple should have enough repsect and love for each other to not resort to violence to get what they want.