America Is The Biggest
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We're Number #1! Now let me sit down and catch my breath.
Americans constantly like to brag about how they are best and the baddest. America #1 is a now a novelty gigantic foam-hand. The United States must always be the best at everything. The best country. And now just now, mind you, but the best nation that ever existed in the history of the world. What else did you think commie?
I believe in the final analysis, America is the best country because of the ideals the nation was founded on. Never perfect, but America is a perfecting experiment. A nation based on liberty, freedom and the belief in human decency made even more remarkable given that such high ideals were pronounced at a time when the rule was tyranny and benighted states of depravity.
But there's another aspect of America: As George Carlin once said, "This country is pig time, big time." And, he added, the national emblem of this country should be a "big bowl of macaroni and cheese".
Americans like to eat. But they will eat anything. Literally anything! This nation invented the cheese-filled hot dog and baconnaise. And it invented fast-foot culture, which now includes a sandwich wrapped in bacon, or some shit.
So here's stat where America is #1.
And there's no disputing that. Try it. And Americans will eat you.
